Season 3

#301

The feathers go flying when the Chicken Lady spots Rooster Boy; Cabbie has his own set of road rules; some cops have more important things to discuss than a dead body.

#302

Puppy won't do tricks; a man who dresses his best to get the paper; a sleepwalking boy steals his dad's money; a restaurant that has a relationship section.

#303

A construction worker firmly denies sleeping on the job; Bruce discovers that he is only 17 inches tall.

#304

A magical flying pig. The Best Actor award at the Oscars results. An axe murderer politely asks an old lady if he can borrow her axe. Men wear earrings in the 90s.

#305

An open letter addressed to the guy who stole a bike wheel and a letter addressed to the people who stood by and watched.

#306

Cops have a long night at a crime scene; Scott tries to blame a clown for spraying his boss with seltzer water; a drag queen with a gun starts a revolution.

#307

Sir Simone has a date in the Pit of Ultimate Darkness; Bruce meets a man who could be his identical twin; a guy mocks people in a waiting room; Danny Husk reads the paper to discover that he has been kidnapped.

#308

Einstein is mocked; three men take pride in their huge guts.

#309

An old lady falls down and then gets robbed, but the cops don't want to get involved; a sketch artist draws people he's never seen based only on their voice; street singers receive a visit from the Loser Research Foundation.

#310

Scott's clone won't stop misbehaving. A man shows his girlfriend a dead body in a field. Mark has to fill in for the Fact Girl while she's on strike.

#311

A woman repeatedly remarries after repeatedly marrying the wrong guy. A man is put on trial for sexually harassing himself. The hip guy and his wife introduce their lovers.

#312

A man has to get back up on a horse after choking on a chicken kabob; cops talk about what they might have done if they hadn't become cops; Buddy searches for a new lover.

#313

A man who works in a wig shop tries to convince everyone he's not bald. A pizza guy lusts after schoolgirls. Sid wonders if he is too small to love.

#314

Poems by the Emperor of Japan; Brice's advice for breaking into showbiz.

#315

A businessman just stares; a man debates whether he should call a girl; the cops wonder why someone would abandon a perfectly good potato.

#316

Mississippi Gary sings the After-Death blues; the Fact Girl discusses the importance of cleaning the ears; one of the Sizzler Sisters becomes sane.

#317

A man reminisces about the Flying Pig; a woman names her god; Tanya annoys people at a party.

#318

The alternate conclusion to "Old Yeller"; drugs and other vices; how to deal with noisy people.

#319

Celebrating Scott's 100th portrayal of a waiter; Hecubus is fired and rehired; a wife walks in on her husband and a thief in bed.

#320

The Bearded Lady; spy models; a horny patient.

#321

Skits include: "Multiple Weddings," "Cabbie Bigot" and "My Pen!"

#322

Skits include: "Chicken Lady at a Strip Bar," "Queen Speaks to Canada" and "Bar Fight.".